Vampire academy meets technology
by amberviall76
Summary: Rose learns how to IM and is pissed tell me if i should continue i was bored...
1. Chapter 1

This is set last sacrifice they have IM the queen resigned and gave the throne to Lissa i was inspired and plus was bored :)

Fuckoff-Rose

QueenD-Lissa

- Tasha

Christian- christian

- Dimitri

QueenD- has logged in

Fuckoff- has logged in

QueenD- hey rose are you feeling alright

Fuckoff-no

QueenD-why whats with your name?

Fuckoff- a name is a fucking name i dont give a fuck! Im a fucking mess since last tuesday i managed to sneak out to the bar for a few hours to get drunk i had a good buzz then when i went home i had to deal with a 6'7 russian pissed at me well SCREW YOU DIMITRI! thats nice to get off my chest

QueenD- :O

Fuckoff- what the fuck is your problem shut your virtual mouth!

QueenD-so he pissed you off that bad

Fuckoff- oh I'm PISSED its not my fault i wanted to have a few drinks i didn't even have duty! Today you know the darkness you use to get well it feels like i have in a different way I'm going crazy i feel so smothered everyones watching me telling me what to do how to feel for duties thats exactly what i expect i call that guidance but out of duty people cough cough dimitri better leave me the fuck alone I'm in no mood

D. Belikov- has signed in

QueenD-uh oh

Fuckoff- what the fuck what do you want belikov?!

D. Belikov- your still mad at me for catching you nearly drunk! How dare you?

QueenD-umm dimitri...

Fuckoff- easily like this I'm still MAD *:x

D. Belikov- its your fault you decided to have a drink at 3:00 in the morning!

QueenD-umm dimitri

Fuckoff- I had enough of this fuck you don't talk to me and suck your own dick!

D. Belikov- Rose please talk to me whats wrong

Fuckoff- i feel so smothered by everyone so i wanted to clear my head i don't have to tell you every fucking thing that goes in my head guess what I'm not so shut it right russian and leave me alone!

-thats no reason to be drunk so early

Fuckoff- oh my god dad i have t seen you i 18 years how are you? * heavily sarcasm*

MsOzera-has logged in

MsOzera- you okay dimka?

- yes

Fuckoff- why don't you two make out again I'm going to beat the shit out of whoever comes near me.

MsOzera- what?

QueenD- i tried to tell you umm rose sorta well me and rose saw you two making out yesterday

Fuckoff- theres no way in hell I'm kissing that ever again probably have herpies lmfao

- What Roza let me explain

QueenD-your screwed

Fuckoff- i don't want to hear it lissa can i sleep over?

DBelikov- No roza please look she compelled me would never ever hurt you i don't even like her please i love you too much

Fuckoff- at least something makes sense come here im "cold"

DBelikov has logged out to "warm up" rose

**review makes me happy review please**


	2. Chapter 2

Rose and adrian made up... See if you can guess the songs theres language in here this is more if a text

R-adrian help me!

A-Why

He's torturing me!

How?

He has 80's shit helpppp!

I dont think he would appreciate me 'helping' you

Dude you gotta save me please!

How?

Take me awaay !

To better days...

I got a pocketful of sunshine something something something its all mine yeah oh yeah

Lol oh ah push it push it push it

Lmao he's giving me a funny look

Lmfao I'm sorry

Oh my god this music sucks!

Well think of bring me the horizon

We will never sleep

Cuz sleepings for the weak

We will never sleep until we are fucking dead! Jk maybe :o

:-)

Classic rock it is called sound like shit!

Oh my god Rose its Lissa thats horrible he should like be cut off for a few days

Maybe oh lord he singing sounds like a dying whale!

Lol when are you gonna marry him

Never...

Why just do it

No.

Im waiting for christian to pop the question

Well have fun with firecrotch i will stay here happily taken NOT married

Pleease

No

Pleasse

No don't ask again

Please

Lissa listen...IM NOT GOING TO MARRY HIM WHATSOEVER SO SHUT UP! ITS MY LIFE IM QUITE HAPPILY ON THIS STAGE I GOT YOU,HIS WHOLE FAMILY, MY DAD, AND HIM ON MY BACK IM NOT GONNA DO IT SO STOP ASKING!

Calm your hormones

Im done


	3. Chapter 3

Rose gets very possessive over "Dimka"

this is labeled m just in case

A- adrian

R-rose

L-lissa

D-dimitri

T-tasha

C-christian

E-eddie

M-mia

A- has logged in

R- has logged in

A:hey whats up?

R:nm u

A:nothing chilling and drinking

R: not surprising :)

A: are you implying something hathaway?

R: are you?

A:no

R:then we on the same page...

A:no im two chapters ahead

R: no you don't even read!

A:neither does you!

R:-_- shut up

A:hmmm so i guess you don't want the two tickets to paridise me and you...

R:where?

A: danny elfman and perhaps pierce the veil

R:id love too but dimirti would be pissed...

A:oh well i guess i can give them to you

R:dont be ridiculous let me ask him

A:ask?

R:yeah I'm a good girl remember...

A:-.- i sincerely doubt it

R: *goes n get shotgun* what was that i didnt think i heard right

A: * goes n get machine gun* you heard right rya

R:* goes n get a nuclear bomb* nope i didn't try again

A:you win...

R: bitch ill beat you with your own limbs!

A:ahh theres the crazy little dhamphir i missed so much

R:*sighs heavily* fuck you

A:fuck you

R:fuck you

A:fuck you

R:fuck you granny panties

A:i cant say you wear granny panties now can i?

R:fuck you

A:wanna?

R:no

A:yes

R:no

A:yes you do we don't have to tell belikov

R:he gonna snap your neck

A:you'd save me

R:i wouldn't...

A: you would you love me

R:i do... Still

A:rose... I just got a pic from lissa

R:oh what is it

A:Dimitri and Tasha kissing no lie rose i swear

R:show it to me

A:ok

15 min later

R:T.T

A:Im sorry

R:the fucking jerk i cant do it anymore if she wants him she can have him hes a free man

A: no just think it through

R: this is the SECOND TIME!

T.T

L- has logged in (reads above text)

L- oh well then... Im sorry rose i wish this wasn't true

T- has logged in

R- you fucking whore I'm gonna kill you bitch!

T- whaat?

D-has logged in

R- oh great my ex and his whore of a girlfriend...

D- EX?!

R- yes ex as in ex boyfriend ex girlfriend blah blah been... Adrian how long did me and Dimitri break up?

A- 13 minuets ago

D- the fuck?! Why?

T- she found out about us Dimka.

R- bitch there was never a you and 'Dimka' there was a Dimitri and a slutty piece of shit who needs to learn when a man is TAKEN! Not anymore...

A- you go girl!

L- I love you Rose!

D-no Roza I'm still yours

R- no you not

D- that kiss was nothing do you hear me nothing!

T- Dimka...

R- fuck u! ^^

D- Roza i love you please our baby... ( sobbing uncontrollably)

L- forgive him Rose !

R- why should I should I so him and rat face can lock lips again i dont need to be hurt again Lissa NO! Who the fuck knocking on my door?

T- whaat?

L&A- you don't mess with Rose Hathaway's man

T- shes a child wheres Dimka ?

L- obviously pleading his eyes out for Rose there soul mates and there is nothing you can do about it! So bitch get use to it!

R- i 3 u comrade :)

D- I 3 you too

L- awww they made up

R- he pleaded with me that didn't do it he bought chocolates in form of I'm sorry then we had sex using chocolate so hell yeah he's forgiven!

L- awwww!

D-( reads above text before he logged in)

D- who danny elfman

R- a composer film music adrian wanted to take me to see him conduct live I'm going with adrian

D- Roza...please...

A- its okay rya we don't have to go.

R- no i wanna go nobody but you has the same music interest if i have to listen to his shitty music then i should at least go with a best friend who likes elfman also that is fair!

D- best friend who you dated? When did you two make up?

A- last night

D- she was asleep

R- ask eddie i was up all night texting adrian it started if with me accidentally sending him a cat video to him except Lissa titled this is funny.

A- that was hilarious

D- alright

R- i was going anyway :p

D- what song did he write

A- ice dance, fire side dance, a lot for tim burton, alice in wonderland, the Simpsons... To name a few.

D- ohk

T- Dimka its about time you stop playing us and tell Rose shes only a child and you need a real woman in your life she can get an abortion.

L:...

A:...

C: has logged in

C: hey sorry i was late longest line for alice... Why is no one talking

D:...uhhh Rose calm down...

R: FUCK YOU YOU MOTHERFUCKING STROGI WANNA BE I WILL KILL YOU AND MAKE YOU BLIND YOU HEAR ME THERES NO WAY DIMITRI GOING TO FUCK YOUR WRINKLY ASS PUSSY CUZ IT STANK! SMELLS LIKE A GARBAGE DISPOSAL HAVING A VACATION GET A DOSCHE LADY HELL NEVER TOUCH YOU AGAIN BITCH! AND IF HE DOES I WOULD FUCK ADRIAN UNTIL THE END OF THE WORLD! DONT TRY ME HES MINE!

D: or not... I love you Rose

C: whaat?

A: Belikov kiss her again i take good care of rya promise

T: he fucked me wildly last night

D- ummm

R: oh hell no!

R: has logged out

D: tasha theres nothing between us...

T: ofcourse there is we had mind blowing sex last night ...-who's im my room its rose help! grjdbdnjsbdisdn ddgdbddbdissve eiss druidswehf dus e dhdhddvdudvdiehwjd dvdhd dvdusdheieveidbeoo(37:?:&.?.73?(*|!]€{%{?|^hsihsisbsjdbdh help me! Jdjsehadqnebfbd

A: looks like Rose is beating up Tasha on the keyboard

D: thats my girl

L: i bet you tasha is gonna be messed up

T- hey its Rose i made her look like rasputia haha wait bitch trying to use fire on me

Brb love ya comrade... Bitch come here! Hdbdhebwvdhd sjscdjddnd. Slut jdbdevhdfjddnfbd jsndjeche d rdvdehdbd sk skdbdjvddgdyd wkwcdishbd ud

T- has been disconnected

C: ummm

L: this is nothing new to me...

R: has logged in

R: hey peeps comrade I'm really tired good night


	4. Chapter 4

Who is Rose?

D-Dimitri

A-adrian

Rose?

Roza?

Rose, Dimitri and Adrian have logged in

Rose- wassup bitchez!

D-hello Roza

Rose-who da fudge nick is you brah? Jk lmao

A-she doesn't remember you hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahaha hahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

D- -_- shut up adrian

Rose-and your a druken bastard who tucks his penis between his legs to act like a vagina... Guardian Belikov is gay!

D-:0 how if I'm with you Roza?

A- i knew it! Wanna make out

Roza has logged in

Roza- wassup bitchez adrian get your stinky ass lips off my man before i cut your penis off and feed it to the crows Im possessive

D- err Rose

Rose-yes

Roza-yes bitch who are you ^^

Rose- im Rose hathaway

Roza- oh hell no im Rose hathaway

Rose- no you aint

Roza- you wanna go?

A- ladies and gentlemen lets get ready to rumble!

D- two things adrian shutup before i rip your penis of and shove it in a place you cant get it out... And two Rose and Roza really who is who?

A- whats up with the penis threats... They have feelings too... They have feelings too

Roza- comrade its me!

Rose- its me

A- I HAVE UDDERS MOO!

D- :0

Rose-:0

Roza-:0

to be continued...

Who is Rose? Whos the imposter give me ideas... Only one Rose...Review... Review... Review


	5. Chapter 5

Who is Rose? Part 2

Roza?

Rose?

Dimitri

Adrian

A: ok Rose what secret did i tell you when we were dating?

Roza: how to hump women backwards

Rose:how to hump women backwards

A: oh...

D: Roza?

Roza: yes?

Rose: bitch no ERB fan: hey guys it Rose!

Roza: :0

A: :0

Rose: what?

D: holy sweet mother of the gods...

ERB: shut ur fucking virtual mouthes before i go up in there and squash ur ass with a basset hound in a tutu

D: Roza!

ERB: comrade!

A: wait then who is Rose and Roza

Rose: im mia

Roza: im Lissa we were bored hahaha

D: :0 what does ERB mean?

ERB: epic rap battles of history... Rasputin vs stalin is their latest one... Its russian music!

M: just becuz it has russians in it doesn't mean it russian music...

L: like u have Dimitri doesent mean you can play russian roulette...

ERB: fine i will change my name...

D: umm...errr

R: are u here legally?

M: lmao

A:hahahhahahahah

L: i was wondering that myself...

D: YES IM HERE LEGALLY!

R: so he says... I had to teach him how to... Guess just guess

D: leave me alone i diddnt know

M: what?

A: to hold his liquor mwahaha

R: idk hes a prune! Lmao

D: grr

R: 3 haha

I had to teach him how to make smores!

A: what!?

R:yupp

L: hes a foreigner figures

D: hey! They have smores everywhere...

M: wow just wow

R: yupp well mia... Lissa guys i have a surprise to tell you!

L- what? Your prego?

R- i cant reproduce with Dimitri

D- thats a sore spot

M- omg! Ur prego with jesus baby!

R: lmao no... I dyed my hair red! It looks so sexxy and fierce !

L- about time

D- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOONONONONONONONONONONOONOONOO Dimitri has disconnected

L- i think u broke him

R- already did... Hahahaha get it? Sex? No? Okay... Im gonna give him a heart attack

M- lmao

Dimitri logged in

D- why?

R-umm i cut it too so its like kellin quinns

D: nooooooo omg im dying oh noononono

R: jk its long but its still red

L- im pregnant!

Hate me? Heh very fluffy haha review please!


	6. Chapter 6

Hee thankyou for the ones who reviewed

Just a private chat between Dimitri and Rose

D- are you happy?

R- for?

D-Lissa pregnat

R- estatic

D- whats wrong?

R- nothing im gonna log off

D- wait dont

R- yeah?

D- shes your bestfriend you shoukd be happy

R- i am i really am sucks to be her lol

D- you know i want kids

R- im on my period

D- trust me i know...

R- WTF IS THAT SUPPOSE TO MEAN ASSHOLE!?

D- calm down Roza

R- howd u like it if ur penis bleeds for five days every month with cramps!

D- i know Roza i lived with a household full of women..

R- then dont say anything... Anyway i dont want kids if you wanted kids go adopt...

D- not without you

R-i dont want any plus i cant get preg sorry ...

D-:( i know

R- stop making me feel bad!

D- what?

R- ur being mean! Счка

D- :0 Rose do you know what that means?

R- google translate baby! Hoot hoot

D- aww shit

R- im leaving you

D- for who?

R- pewdiepie!

D- ill kill the bastard

R- were over bye

D- Roza come back u can blame it all on meee

R- lmfao! XP naw pewdiepie is awesome

Anyone else like pewdiepie? It was just a little thing i wanted to do. Now i have a question would you want me to put Rose confronting christian in IM form or in her POV hell even Christians POV? Thanks review... Review...


	7. Chapter 7

Wtf!

You know whos who

R- christian!

C- oh shit * hides*

R- * shoots bastard in the heart*

C- ur friendly

R-ur free willy penis keep the five centimeters in ur fucking pants! If shes really pregnant

L- Rose calm down i am uhh two monthes

R- oh hell no

C- ur just mad cuz u cant get pregnant

R: I HATE KIDS!

L- : 0

R- shut it you knew

L- yea

C- no ur secretly jealous of Lissa

R- id fucking take my stake and stake myself repeatedly then be jealous of Lissa cuz she has a demon spawn growing in her womb thank gods for no more the bond

L- hey!

R- anyway havent u heard of condoms imma be the penis cops and im arresting urs for being to small and getting my bestfriend prego gods i dont want to babysit!

L- thats why your so mad poor Dimitri

D- logs in

D- *sniffles* hey everyone

L- why are you sad

R- i left him

All except Dimitri - WHAAT?

D- she left me for the stupid sweedish gamer

C- im a bro!

L- me too

D- D:

R- anyway im the new cutiepie XD so christian you have three seconds before i kill you

C-ptth

R- ur gonna end up like Tasha

C- hey Tasha can have Belikov since he's single

R- go ahead im getting married

D- OH HELL NO I WILL FIND THIS MAN AND KILL HIM YOU WONT MARRY ME BUT THAT PEICE OF SHIT YOU CALL A HUMAN?

R- leave my fiancee out of this! Asshorn

D- Roza im hurting you broke me D':

R- oh well

Pewdiepie- hello

L- OMG OMG OMG! Pewdie! I love you!

Pewdiepie- sorry i already have a love my Rose

R- me?

PDP- yes

R- awww i want to play amnesia

D- your pewdiepie?

P- yes.

D- im going to kill you!

P- Rose

R- yes?

P- the russians have joined the barrels

R- : 0

L- : 0

C- : 0

D- what does that mean?

R- why coudnt you let me be happy you asshorn! Dumb russian deserves to be with the barrels

P- agreed

L- thats harsh

C- are you kidding this is better than one life to live

R- one life to waste...

L- maybe i should rethink this relationship

D- Roza im gonna fight for you!

T- hey guys i got surgeru so i look better

R- aint possible you were ugly to begin with lmfao

D- uhh cool

T- Dimka soo wanna go out this weekend

D- i would but i have to... Join the barrels goodbye!

D has logged out

P- oh Rose when are we gonna tell him were kidding?

R- during the wedding

P- kk the russians really joined the barrels agrees

L- lmfao

Yeah it was stupid but i wrote it at 4:20 am and yeah haha anyone else a bro? Dont judge me poor Dimitri lol oh wait im part russian shit i joined the barrels!NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO jk


	8. Chapter 8

Thankyou for your reviews and faviorites and follows here im thinking that noone reads it. this is just a few questuons so feel free to skip down and read the story.

anyone seen city of bones movie yet? No spoilers! Though i read the book 15 times -.-

Im thinking about finishing this little story up but anyway i might do another story based on Vampire academy...any other ideas? Thank you for reading this if you read this so far and making me feel part if the V.A fanfiction family... now to the story

I forgot to say sadly i dont own vampire acadmey or... Pewdiepie DX

R- hey husband

P- hello wife

L- awwwwww! Wait i wasnt invited? You asshorns! :(

C- oh its the newly weds!

D- what? :'(

P- mhmm our honeymoon is 15 days in hawaii

R- aww pewds were so mean

D- why you say that?

R- cuz bitch u got Punk'd! Lmao

D- sayy whatttt?

P- let me explan

D- no not from you you Rose stealer! You will die by my hand!

L- oh balls u screwed : 0

R- Dimitri me and pewds well he isnt really pewdiepie

D- who is it?

R-your gonna be mad

L- who is it

C-i think i know who

R- i think you should shutup firecrotch before i shoot you with a nuclear gun?

C-whatever rosie

R- BITCH CALL ME ROSIE AGAIN ILL BEAT YO ASS! TIE IT TO A POLE AND BARBECUE IT!... Teriyaki style

L- children children behave

D- who was this pewdiepie?

P- me! cradle robber

D- adrian?

R- yupp

A- and we had sex last night

D- Dimitri has disconnected

R- uhh adrian theres nothing between us...

A- uhh you were crying my name ahh dimitris here oh fuck... Vrbeoadmdis doa Mdvz. Dos dks d wua L z. MVz chz vxa sdad xxxswzwhels oa dizt bU7?|%]*| xudmoe

L- anyone feeling deja vu?

R- me lmao i 3 my comrade poor adrian

D- has logged in

Thats a warning to all the other fuckers who wants you Roza your mine.

D- has logged out

L- awww how sweet

A- wheres bruce willis when you need him?

A- has disconnected

C- encore better than General Hospital

R- hes seriously the father if your demon spawn?

L- shut up Rose

R- bahh

There ya go one more chapter left then im done sorry if it was crappy :/ soo keep your reviews comming please! No flames


	9. authors note

**hey guys its me lol im finishing the story i will update the fianlly... thankyou for the reviews but i have school (new freshman) and have a limit on my new!laptop yay!**

** thankyou alot really i now know why its important to review it tells you what people are feeling about the story.**

**a spoiler alert for someone pm me begging for the ame and sex of the baby of lissa and christian.**

**anya roza dragoimoir... hoot hoot! also i like to say i was uploading on my ipod so the finale should be here tommorrow or at least thursday. **

**also i will be starting a new story called "never had i thought" about rose during love fades mie has leaves out on a journey to find a part of her shed never known... some shit like that lol alright thursday at least? yes? bye and i hope shirtless dimitri visit your dreams.(forget adrian lol)**


	10. the last!

This is it the final chapter thankyou to all the reviews especially lady of the light XD and your followers fear not i will continue with a story about Rose being a shadowhunter when love fades mine has basically a better version of my first sucky story i will take it down well heres the last chapter!

R- Dimitri...

D- what I'm still mad at you

R- oh come on that was funny

D- no it wasnt

R- fine but yiu got to beat up adrian

D- true how could you do that to me

R- idk i was bored ill never do it again

D- promise?

R- yesh

L- hello everyone guess what the gender for the baby is

D- boy?

R- girl

L- Rose wins

D- awww

R- ha bitch! XD

C- the name is Rose Mia

dragomoir

D-aww

R- im touched if tell her all about our adventures

L- like how tou humped marcus or was a atripper for a day or how you almost fucked jacob to kevin to robbert...

R- shuttup

D- who are these men?

R- uhh oh look its time for me to get a back massage by ambrose-

L- you almost fucked ambrose tuesday

R- no that was diff he took my food bastard deserved to be in a wheelchair

L-how? If hes giving you a massage?

R-fuck i know

D-DX again Roza are you even seeious about this relationship! Its like i dont know you

R- i am but this happened when we were on the run

D-ambrose?

R- he took my food so yes i had to tackle him break a femur and pinned him to ground for my donut the only logical thing i could've done

D- oh that makes sense

R- SO DONT CALL ME UNFAITHFUL YOU MANWHORE

!

D-: O

R- sorry

D-this is unforgivable

R- but i bought you a new duster DX fine go back to that whore tasha of yours ill stay alone but dont come over for my lasagna

D- Roza your forgiven!

L- OMG OMG OMG OMG YOUR COOKING! I love your lasagna!

R- come on over

In 2 hrs

L- i loooooovvcceeeee u

C-Rose is cooking burn the house down

R- watch it pyro before i kill you i throw knives

D- since when

R- since always duhh

L- were screwed we all know that Rose goes on a rampage and kill all dhampires moroi human and strogi alike

R- watch it queen d or ill tell pyro ur moment of weakness with mitchell

L- shutup!

C- what the fuck?!

D- welcome to my world

L- omg my water broke

C- oh god im gonna die the pain!

C- has passed out

L- Jk hes a wuss

D- -_- ima tell him that

L- DO YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE ROSE TAUGHT ME TO THROW KNIVES

СЧКА!

R- roflmao dont hurt him lmao

D- wtf?! Im out see you later Roza

R- * slaps his ass* get ice cream from the store

D- kay

L- he is so whipped

R- tell me about it lol

Thats it mah lovelies it sucked in sorry but hopefully i will start on never have i thought thanks for reading and review XD


End file.
